ctmi concerned parents

I gave my life to the Lord in 1982 and started my Christian journey with one desire, and that was to give everything to Jesus. At the time I was born again, I was studying at Pietermaritzburg University to become a lawyer and had two more years to finish my legal degree. While writing my exams that year, I knew that I had studied hard and was confident that I would pass; yet, at the same time I had a strong conviction that I would not be returning to University the following year.

It was so evident to me that my life was no longer my own, and that it now belonged to the Lord. All I wanted was to serve Him with all my heart. I believed that the Lord had a different plan for my life, which was to go to Bible School and to pursue the direction of serving the Lord in full time ministry. Money, position and titles were no longer an issue to me and it didn’t matter where I lived or how I lived. All I wanted to do was give up everything to follow the Lord.

I made a decision to leave University and planned to start studying the Word of God at Bible School. I knew my mother would support my decision because she was a Christian but my concern was my father who was not a believer and I knew he wanted me to become a professional man, like he was. When I shared my conviction with him I was so grateful for his response. Although disappointed in my decision, he said he wanted me to follow the direction that I felt was right for my life, and he was willing to respect and supported my decision. My dad has since passed away but I have never forgotten how gracious and supportive he was to me.

At the same time that these changes were stirring in my heart, one of the leaders in my church actually discouraged me from quitting my studies. But I thank God that I followed the conviction of my heart and not the voice of man. I wasn’t in rebellion or acting independently; I was merely responding to what the Lord was asking of me. I had such simple faith to lose everything for Him.

This was the road that the Lord had chosen for me, and until today, I’ve have seen the fruits of this obedience to the Lord not only in my own life, but in the lives of others as well. I am currently serving as an elder in the church, preaching and teaching the Word of God and I am so grateful to see the Lord changing lives. Truly the gospel, as Paul says in the book of Corinthians, is the power unto salvation. Had I listened to the voice of man, the voice of reason, and stayed at university, I honestly do not know where I would be today. How can I have any regrets in following the Lord?

The conviction that God was calling me was so strong and so clear to my heart in those early days after my conversion. The problems came later. I began my journey so innocently, with such a desire and purity to serve the Lord with all my heart. But slowly winds of doctrine started to influence and taint my life. From a simple understanding and desire to lose everything for Christ, I began to strive in my own efforts to serve the Lord. Soon, it became more important what car I was driving, what certificates I had on the wall, which people I knew, and what I was attaining materially. It became all about me! When I started, it was all about Jesus, freely abandoning everything to follow His plan for me. But I began living for myself, no longer concerned for others. I became more interested in my ministry, in my position, and in the Bible School that I was building. I had missed the mark completely.

I thank God because it was at this time in the late nineties, long before CTMI even existed, that Miki Hardy brought the simple message of the Cross of Jesus Christ to my life. I had never heard this message preached before. Believe it or not, I had been the Dean of a Bible School and teaching for 3 years; yet I had absolutely no understanding or revelation of what it meant to deny myself and identify my life with the Cross of Christ. The Lord used Miki and other servants of God to put me back on track and bring me back onto the true foundation of Jesus Christ and Him crucified.

I am so grateful for everything the Lord has done in my life and this opportunity to share my personal testimony with you. In short, Jesus made it very clear in Luke 9:24: “Whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it!”

With love in Christ

Neil Martin, Pastor – Durban, South Africa